A Very Dramatical Message

 

To all the peoples on the innernets,

This is Mazie Grace speakin'.  I'm real upset and hurt.  My big sister, Miss Elizabeth Taylor, is bein' mean to me.  She is a butt head.  She thinks 'cause she is real pretty that she can be mean and git away wiff it.  She also thinks she's better than me 'cause I am what is called "blind as a bat".  I can't help it that I can't see nothin'!  Her favoritist thing to do in the world is to stick her fingernails into me.  It hurts and I want her to stop.

She was bein' mean to me this mornin' and mommy picked her up real fast and chopped all her fingernails off!  It was VERY dramatical!  And, mommy fussed at her and told her to never ever NEVER do that again...see, Miss Elizabeth Taylor, mommy loves me, TOO!!!  You ain't the only pritty girl in this house.  You might be pritty on the outsides but you is butt-ugly on the insides sometimes.  STOP BEIN' MEAN TO ME!!!

Very truly yours,
Mazie Grace