Dearest peoples on the innernets,
As we have been tellin' y'all all week, there's a tiny little baby boy in the house. He is 2 weeks old and only weighs 8.5 ounces. He is very cute. I decided to visit him today...he noticed my greatness immediately and wanted to git as close as he could to me. Unfortunately, I am a very busy Senator that just ain't got time for a little squirt like him. Maybe in a few months, when he can appreciate the wonder of Nip, I will be able to hang out with him and we can git our buzz on together. The last thing I need right now is to be busted for contributin' to the delinquency of a minor.
Hang tough, Little Soldier. You MIGHT be a wonnerful as me one day...this is America, after all...anything is possible if you just believe!
Very truly yours,
Senator Henry Jackson Edward Graves III
