Whiskers & Purrs

Top Cat Tuesday!

Dearest peoples on the innernets,

This is Elsie Fallulah Graves speakin' and it is now time for Top Cat Tuesday.  After all the activities in London and my hard works at the Royal Weddink, I'm weared outs.  It is time for me to git caughted up on my sleeps and git ready for my boyfriend, Rudy's, big birthday bash comin' up at the end of the week.  We is gonna partay like rockstars.

But for now...Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...

Very truly yours,

Elsie Fallulah Graves
Top Cat and Royal Weddink Planner 

Meet the Senator Sunday: From the Royal Wedding

Dearest peoples on the innernets,

This is Senator Henry Jackson Edward Graves III speakin'.  It's now times for "Meet the Senator Sunday".  As you all knows, me and the entire Gang came to London for the big ass Royal Weddin'.  We has been havin' one heckuva rockin' time!  

This is a picture of me and Elsie Fallulah hangin' out with the Queen and the King.  I want to make sure I innerduce you to my knew womans...her name is Pippa!  DANG...she is hot!  Me and her have been gittin' our freak on togethers...I'm a little bit worrieds, though...she's startin' to git all clingy and stuff...it's time for me to git back to the Whiskers & Purrs House before she starts gittin' any ideas, what with all this weddin' and vows and betrothin' goin' ons.

Okay, time for me to go git my freak on one last time before me and the Gang has gots to go back home.

Very truly yours,

Senator Henry Jackson Edward Graves III

Elsie and the Ugly Little Girl from the Royal Wedding

Dearest peoples on the innernets,

This is Elsie Fallulah Graves speakin' from London.  The big ass Royal Weddin' is now overs.  I am just a little bit disgusterateds 'cause after all my hard work to pull this big ass shindig off, this is the picture they been puttin' in the newspapers and on the televisions:

Why in the worlds did they have to put ME next to the sour puss little girl?  As you can see by the look on my face, I am not pleased!   PFFT!

More to come from London later!

Very truly yours,

Elsie Fallulah Graves
Top Cat & Royal Wedding Planner 

Elsie Fallulah Graves: Royal Wedding Update

 

Dearest peoples on the innernets,

This is Elsie Fallulah Graves speakin' all the way from the Royal Weddin' in London.  I am very real busy, as I am sure you can imagines.  Here's a brief rundown on what has been goin' ons...

1. I had to supervise the final fittin' of Kate's big ass dress yesterday...i think it turned out real nice.
2. Last nights we had a slummer partay with Kate...just me and the girls from the Gang plus Frejya and Gertie.  it was funs but...I believe Kate eated a few too many Cheesy Poofs last night...we like to never got her zipped into her big ass dress this  mornin'!
3. While us womenses was busy slummer partayin' with Kate, the boys was runnin' amoks in the palace.  Little Joey founded some of the  Queen's Granny Panties...and almost gotted catched.  
4. The boys embarrassimicated me like you wouldn't believe...they pointed out to Wills that he has a ginormous shiny bald spot...they offered to donate some of their furs to cover it ups.  Wills politely declined the offer...I wanted to die right there. 
5. And, finally, as I feared would happen...just before Kate gotted outs of the car to go git marrieds, the Senator took a gigantical piss on the red carpets...I just can't take him anywheres.

That's it for now...pictures will come tomorrow and more details of all the partayin' we is gonna do today and tonights.

Very truly yours,

Miss Elsie Fallulah Graves

Ready for the Big-Ass Day!

Dearest peoples on the innernets,

This is Elsie Fallulah Graves speakin'. Well, we is finally ready to leave for our big trip to Englands. My schedule is full. We is leavin' this mornin' at 11:00 to head over to Frejya Macro's house in London. Do you like my big-ass hat? It's just one of the many many big-ass hats I will be wearin' over this weekends.

This afternoons I will be supervisin' Kate's final big-ass dress fittin'. Then tonights, the rest of the girls will join us for a big-ass slumber party with Kate. The boys is probably gonna runs amoks in the palace. I am worrieds that the Senator will start his thinkin' outsides of the box while he is there...I just hope he don't git caughted.

I will be providin' live updates of all the events on the bloggy and on my Facebook page. Please be sure to tune in. I'm so exciteds that I git to be a part of such a big-ass historical event! I have a feelin' I will go down in history as the best big-ass royal weddin' planner in the worlds.

Very truly yours,

Elsie Fallulah Graves

Elsie preps for the Royal Wedding

Dearest peoples on the innernets,

This is Elsie Fallulah Graves speakin'. We have all been very real busy gittin' ready for our big trip to England to see the Royal Weddin'. As many of you might recalls, we gots us an invitation to go see Kate marry Wills. The whole Gang is goin' and I will be in charge.

We will be leavin' on Thursday mornin'. As you might imagines, it's a big responsibility to be in charge of all these little people. So...I have set up some ground rules that they best follow or I will be sendin' their sorry little behinds back home by way of a slow boat to China...and...we don't live in China so it will take a very real long time for them to git back to the Whiskers & Purrs House!

So, Whiskers & Purrs Gang...do not git on my nerves while we is aways. I gots a lot to git done while I am there. I gots to supervise Kate's final big-ass dress fittin', snoop through the queens dresser drawers, run amoks through the palace with Frejya Macro, Rudy Hess, Boob and Gertie Parker and make sure lots of pictures is taken of me wearin' my big-ass hats. SO...DO NOT GIT ON MY NERVES! Here are the rules you gots to follows:

1. Stay outs of my way and don't go jackin' my style. Me and Rudy Hess is gonna be goin' on some hot dates while we is there so do not disturb us!
2. Do not git into any troubles.
3. Senator Henry Jackson Edward Graves III, do not go messin' with any skanky womenses. Remember...you are representin' America. Don't git in no troubles 'cause I ain't gonna come bail your sorry behind outs of jail.
4. Fergie the Duchess of Huntsmoor, we will need to be sneakin' 'round the palace...turn the volumes of your purrs way downs...Fergie Noises will not be appreicated.
5. Mrs. Lilly White, you are very prim and propers...you should fit right ins. Just don't go stickin' your fingernails into Mazie Grace, though...it will cause her to scream bloody murder and bring all kinds of attentions to us.
6. Mademoiselle Coco Chanel, just stay a real scaredy cat and hide unnerneath stuff.
7. Georgie Porgie Puddinandpie, do NOT go kissin' a bunch of girls and makin' 'em cry.
8. Miss Elizabeth Taylor, remember that this is Kate's big day. Don't go tryin' to git all cozified with Wills.
9. Mazie Grace, be sure to take you blind-person-cane. I ain't gonna have time to pick you up if you fall down stairs or off of frigerators like you do at home all the times.
10. Buzzy Randolph Graves III, I know you is real shy and stuff...you can just be my slave assistant and I will keep you safe.
11. Jimmy Durante Graves III, don't be stickin' your nose into other people's businesses...and...don't go pickin' any fights. See #3 to unnerstand that I WILL NOT HAVE TIME BAIL YOU OUTS OF JAILS.
12. Freddy Astaire Graves III, I knows you love to dance and stuff. Just make sure you is dancin' when it's really dancin' time and not in the middle of, oh I don't know, maybe the weddin' ceremony and 'cause any kind of embarrassin' scenes.
13. Little Joey Cartwright Graves III, just stay outs of my way. Hang out with Frejya. I trust her and she will keep you from doin' somethin' stupids.
14. Buddy Holly & Holly Berry, you is gonna be our decoys...in case anybody gits into to troubles, you guys need to show ups and do your cute "goo goo gaa gaa" bit, look pitifuls and git attentions away from whoevers is in troubles. That will give them time to gits away while everybody is "oohin' and ahhhin'" over yous.

Now I am serious 'bout my rules. Don't cross my path or I will open up a can of whoop ass on you.

Very truly yours,

Elsie Fallulah Graves
Top Cat