Dearest peoples on the innernets,
This is Mrs. Lilly White speakin'. I just wanted you all to git a chance to see me...glorious me...and simply experience my beauty and fantabulousness. This is my gift to you all.
Very truly yours,
Mrs. Lilly White
Dearest peoples on the innernets,
This is Mazie Grace speakin'. Mommy says I gots to write a disclaimer before I git this here post started...it could be embarrassin' to some peoples. Stop readin' now if you is 'fraid of talkin' 'bout girl stuff...
Okays...now we got that outta the way. I wanted to let y'all know 'bout a new toy I finded. Everybody knows I am blind as a bat. I git along real good even though I am in the dark. I am really good at innertainin' myself. I like to sneak 'round and explore stuff. Well, I have discovered a brand new toy while I was doin' my explorin'...
I don't know what these things are but I just love 'em! I was snoopin' in the bathroom cabinet and finded a whole dang box of 'em. The side of the box says the word "Tampons"...I just love how that word sounds...tampons, tampons, tampons! The box also says "feminims protection". Well, I just figure if these things protect feminims, they gotta be okay to play with, right?
I have come up with all kinds of games to play with my tampons. I play tampon toss, tampon touch footballs, tampon jugglin', tampon tag, and tampon jump and shout. And, when my tampon dies, I have a complete burial ceremony, complete with a moment of silence, just before I bury him in the litter box. Mommy came home last night and finded 3 tampons buried in the litter box. I guess yesterday was a bad day for my tampons.
My favoritest thing is to play hide-and-go-seek with my tampons. The funny thing is that I sometimes forgit where I leave 'em. So, I have to go git more in order to keep the game goin'. Mommy has been findin' my tampons all over the house...she said she will just die of embarrassment if we have company and they find a tampon just layin' in the floor or unnerneath a cushion or somethin'. I don't unnerstand why mommy gits so worked up over this...
I think tampons are loads of fun.
Very truly yours,
Mazie Grace
Dearest peoples on the innernets,
This is Fergie the Duchess of Huntsmoor speakin'. Today our post will be short...mommy still has the hurty inside her back. We must tend to her....on tops of all them other things we do for her! We are worried because it is very important that she feels better so that she will be strong enough to open them Fancy Feast cans and scoop poops.
Also, we is gonna make her go see the Mommy Vet very real soon. See, she is real good 'bout makin' us go see the vet when we is sick but...she really sucks when she needs to go see her vet. That ain't right. We is gonna look on the innernets to see if there's a carrier we could shove her in and take her ourselves. Does anybody know if there is such a thing?
Very truly yours,
The Whiskers & Purrs Gang
Visions of sugar plums are dancin' in Elsie & Henry's heads...
To all the peoples on the innernets, this is Elsie Fallulah and Senator Henry Jackson Edward Graves III speakin'.
As you can see, it ain't easy bein' us. There's so much nappin' to be done and never enough time...we do all we can.
Very truly yours,
Elsie Fallulah Graves & Senator Henry Jackson Edward Graves III
