Dearest peoples on the innernets,
I am sad to report that I am havink yet another unfortunate hiney incident and I am at the vet's office today. My tushy is all stinky, sore, swolled-up and itchy. It's 'cause my beautiful belly is a size extra-large and it, in all of its rotundness, prevents me from bein' ables to clean my very important private stuff. As a result I have a very hurty hiney.
Mommy said it was time for my yearly check-up anyways so...off to the new vet we went this mornink. Mommy dropped me off first thing. They is gonna give me a bath, shave my hiney, give me some ointmints to help it all start to heal, give me my yearly exam, give me my vaxanations, drain out my bloods for tests and make me pee in a cup.
Since I was so skeert when I got there this mornink, they is gonna give me some happy medicine to help me relax...like mommy says...better livink through farmasootikals.
So, dear people on the innernets, I would greatly appreciate it if you would please say a prayer for me and my unfortunate hiney.
Very truly yours,
Miss Elsie Fallulah Graves
