Dearest peoples on the innernets,
This is Senator Henry Jackson Edward Graves III speakin'. I know this is usually Mazie Monday day but...ain't y'all 'bout tired of hearin' 'bout Mazie? I think you need a break. I'm sure by now you has heard that the North Korea dude named Kim Jong Il has up and died "due to overworks"...that's us politician language for "he got tired of sittin' on his fanny doin' evil stuff so he up and dieds". He was a bad bad mans that just happened to have a girls name.
Back in June 2009, I did my first ever "Meet the Senator Sunday" and it focused on Mr. Il himselfs. I thought it would be fittin' for us to rerun that edition of my very important segment. See...he shoulda listened to me...he would probably be alives today if he would've just straightened up and flied rights. Oh well...there's one less bad man in the world today.
So...without further adooose, here's my first ever Meet the Senator Sunday tellin' Mr. Kim Jong Il what I think 'bout him.
Very truly yours,
Senator Henry Jackson Edward Graves III
June 14, 2009
Dearest peoples on the Innernets,
I am proud to announce that from now on, every Sunday we will have "Meet The Senator Sunday" at the Whiskers and Purrs House. Just like the beans do on Sundays with Face the Nation and Meet the Press, we will have innalekchewal comments from me 'bout serious topics of the day. We will remind everybody on Friday's to send us your questions and topics. We will try to answer 'em on Sunday.
Here's the first topic for Meet the Senator Sunday:
Dearest Senator Henry Jackson Edward Graves III,
What is goin' on with North Korea? Why are they makin' bombs and stuff?
Very truly yours,
Anonymous
My dear Anonymous, I do not know what is goin' on with North Korea. First of all, we live on the West end of Richmond. Is North Korea close to us? I sure hope not!
I will say that I think that mean ol' Kim Jong Il...uhm...dude, you have a girl's name...is very means and not nearly as handsome as me. Now, in his defense, he cannot help the fact that he is very ugly, but...I have just a few words for him.
Dear Mr. Il,
Why are you so mean? Did your mommy not raise you right? You better be glads you don't live in the Whiskers & Purrs House! My mommy says that you have to play nice with people and not be mean. She says you need a time out in the bathroom with the door closed all by yourself so you can think 'bout all them mean things you do every day...what with all them nuclear bombs you're testin' and all. No Temptations for you, Mister, until you straighten up and fly right!
Very truly yours,
Senator Henry Jackson Edward Graves III
And so, my dearest friends on the innernets, there you have it. Our first ever "Meet the Senator Sunday" and my thoughts on North Korea.
Very truly yours,
Senator Henry Jackson Edward Graves III
