Dearest peoples on the innernets,
This is Mazie Grace speakin' and today is Mazie Monday! Well, my dearest peoples, there's reasons to rejoice every which way I turns around! First of alls...the Royal Weddink was wonnerfuls. I only gotted losted once. And, we all had us a good time!
Secondly, last nights the US of America opened up a can of whoop ass on Osama bin Laden. He was a bad bad man that killeded thousands of innocent peoples. I gots a very special message for Osama....
"Mr. Osama bin Laden, sir, you didn't think us dumb ol' infadels would ever be smart enough to find your sorry behind, now did you? You thoughted we was only lookin' for you unnerneath flat rocks and caves and stuff. Karma can be a biotch, Mr. Osama bin Laden, sir...you finally climbed all over Miss Karma's last nerve and she showed you who the real boss is. You is now swimmin' with the fishes and have gone to meet your maker. Justice is sweet."
Okay, I'm gonna go take me a naps 'cause I'm weared out from all the weddink and whoop ass can openin' from the last 48 hours. Remember, today is Mazie Monday...your beans have to stop what they is doin' whenever you walks into a room and start hummin' "Hail to the Chief".
Very truly yours,
Mazie Grace
