Dearest peoples on the innernets,
This is Mazie Grace speakin'. Today is Mazie Monday! I am very sad to tell you some very disappointin' news. All of us in the Whiskers & Purrs Gang are very real aggrivated. See...mommy went home to visit her mommy this past weekend. Her mommy is very real sick. She has been moved to a new hospital. The hospital is very big and has a parkin' garage hooked to it. There is a very cool connector that lets beans walk from the garage to the hospital without havin' to go to the outsides...heaven forbid if a bean gits exposed to the elements...mommy is pretty sure she will die right there on the spot if she gits too hot or too colds or gits exposed to rain, sleet, snow or hail. Oh! And don't even ask me how she gits worked up if she gits "too much sun"!
Anyways...mommy had been to visit her mommy on Sunday and was walkin' back with her dad to the car. They were in the cool connector thingy. It has gigantical windows all along the sides of it with vents to keep it from gittin' too hot. While mommy and her dad was walkin' through it, don't you just know that a little tiny (tastey) birdy flied in through the vents! It started flyin' 'round and bangin' its head on the windows tryin' to git away...dumb birdy...
Now...all of y'all knows that a GOOD cat mommy would say "AHA! That would make a tastey feast for my childrens. I must snatch it and take it home for suppers." Do you think OUR mommy said them words? OH NOES! Our mommy said, "OH NO! We must help it find its way OUT of the parking garage! Dad, help me catch it!!!" Mommy then proceeded to try to catch the little tastey birdy...for like maybe 25 minutes! I am so embarrassed! If anybody saw her, I just know they were ready to call the police on the crazy woman!
After chasin' the little birdy she finally was ables to help the little snack find its way outta the garage...a perfectly nutritious meal flied right out the window! Have you ever heard of such waste? Mommy is really not settin' a good example for us...it's a wonder we ain't all juvenille delinquents with such neglect.
In honor of the little snack that got away, I am goin' to share this video with you. Remember, on Mazie Monday your beans have to stop what they is doin' when you walk into a room and hum "Hail to the Chief"...don't let 'em forgit it!
Very truly yours,
Mazie Grace
