Whiskers & Purrs

URGENT: Operation Kathy Griffin to the Rescue!

Dearest peoples on the innernets,

This is Miss Elsie Fallulah Graves speakin'.  As you all knows, more than anything in my nine lifes, I want to be Anderson Cooper's cat.    I watch him every night he is on TV and I pray for BREAKIN' NEWS in the hopes he will be on TV all day and all nights.  Even though he has broked my heart over and over agains, I still want to be his cat and live in his big mansion in NYC and have his maid feed me Fancy Feast and crunchies and I want to sit on his lap after he comes home from workin' so hard on AC360 and I will sing him my purry songs and maybe he will let me sniff behind his ears 'cause I just KNOW he smells good and his mommy will make me jeans and stuff.   Please know I DO NOT WANT TO MARRY HIM OR NOTHIN'...Ewwww....he's a bean...you know...a human bean.  I just wanna be his cat. 

Well, I think maybe I gots one last hope...see our favoritest comedian in the whole dang worlds, Miss Kathy Griffin, is gonna be on TV with him tomorrow night to ring in the New Years!  And...she's askin' people to send her questions to ask my Anderson Cooper live on TV.  Well...I would like to ask all of my dear friends on the innernets to have Miss Kathy Griffin ask my Anderson Cooper to just wish me a very real Happy New Year...and...if she will do that...the Whiskers & Purrs Gang will donate $1000 to Alley Cat Allies.  FOR FREAKIN' REALS!  Now I knows to big fancy TV stars like Kathy and my Anderson $1000 ain't a whole dang lots but...it will go a long way in helpin' homeless kitties.  And, I used to be homeless and I know how bad it sucks to be cold and hungry and not have anybody to scratch your stuff when you need it scratched!

So...here's how you reach Miss Kathy:

Twitter:  @kathygriffinGriffin
Facebook:  Kathy Griffin

Just leave her lotsa messages askin' her to visit this link:  http://www.whiskersandpurrs.com/operation-birthday-wish/  to learn 'bout Elsie Fallulah Graves and her mad adoration of her Anderson Cooper and ask her if she will ask Anderson to wish Elsie a very Happy New Year.  If Anderson does it, the Whiskers & Purrs Gang will donate $1000 to Alley Cat Allies in both Anderson and Kathy's name...that means they will BOTH git the credit for it in heaven...for reals!   Be sure to tell Miss Kathy that, too!

I have been so sad all week 'cause I've been missin' my mommy...plus with that unfortunate tushy-incident a few weeks ago...I just need somethin' good to happen.  Please help me, dear peoples.  It will mean the world to me and the whole Whiskers & Purrs Gang...and it will help a lotta homeless kitties, too.

Very truly yours,
Miss Elsie Fallulah Graves

A message for Mommy Jenny from Senator Henry Jackson Edward Graves III

Dearest mommy,

I am sorry I hurted your ear.  I didn't mean to do it.  I knows you are very real mads at me.  I know my big, high-powered attorney, Boob Boobonivich, says I ain't supposed to say nothin' 'bout the unfortunate incident but I just can't stand to have you mads at me.  If you will just forgive me, I promise to use litter box every single day in 2010 and never ever pee in the floor agains.

I'm sorry, mommy.  I love you.

Very truly yours,
Senator Henry Jackson Edward Graves III

BREAKING NEWS: Virginia Senator arrested for domestic violence-related incident

RICHMOND, Virginia (Cat News Network) -- The Cat News Network has just confirmed that Virginia Senator Henry Jackson Edward Graves III (D-VA) has been arrested on assualt charges stemming from a domestic violence-related incident that occurred today in his primary residence, The Whiskers & Purrs House, located in Richmond, Virginia. 

Details of the incident are still being clarified.  It has been confirmed that the Senator's mommy, Mommy Jenny, had traveled home after a long week of moving her mom and dad into a new house far, far away.  While Mommy Jenny was checking her normally boring Facebook page, the Senator decided to sit down in the most coveted spot in the house - on the back of her desk chair.  At the same time, the Senator's baby sister, Mazie Grace, decided that she wanted to sit on the back of the desk chair, too.  Unfortunately, Mazie Grace is blind-as-a-bat and was not aware that the Senator had already called "dibs" on the spot. 

What happened next is still a bit sketchy but, we have confirmed that when Mazie Grace jumped onto the back of the chair, the Senator began barking like a seal, leading some to suspect nip intoxication.  Toxicology test results are currently pending.  After barking like a seal, the Senator began to swing his left front paw wildly.  Although he missed Mazie Grace by a mile, he nailed his mommy smack-dab in the ear.  All of his claws hooked onto Mommy Jenny's ear.  The Senator then began to pull his paw away which caused his mommy's ear to rip.  As you might imagine, Mommy Jenny cussed like a sailor as she realized that the Senator had almost ripped her ear off...(okay, the cussing like the sailor part is true.  The "almost ripped her ear off" part is for dramatic effect.)

Mommy Jenny took herself to the nearest Patient First clinic because she was afraid of infection and...it was bleeding like a son-of-a-gun and she wasn't sure if she needed stitches.  She has now returned home, stitchless but with antibiotics, and is resting comfortably.

The Senator is currently being detained in the spare bedroom until he learns his lesson.  No court date has been set.  The Cat News Network will keep you up to date on these rapidly changing events as we receive new information.  Stay tuned for more breaking news.

Very Merry Happy Holidays!

Dearest peoples on the innernets,

On behalfs of all the Whiskers & Purrs Gang, and mommy, too, I want to wish all our dear friends on the innernets a Very Merry Happy Holiday.  We hope today brings lotsa purrs, headbutts, kisses and tummy & tushy rubs to everyone of you.

Very truly yours,
Elsie Fallulah Graves
& the entire Whiskers & Purrs Gang...and mommy, too!

And the winner is...

Dearest peoples on the innernets,

We are excited to tell you that WE GOTS US A WINNER!!!  WOO HOO!!!  Our big contest was a big ol' success!  Thanks to everyone that participated!  We had 24 peoples leave a comment on the bloggy and 4 peoples leaved a comment on Facebooks.

So here's what we did...we made a list of all the peoples that leaved a comment in the order they leaved 'em.  Here's what it looked like:

#1  Heidi P.
#2  Laila & Minchie  
#3  Mary Roever & Mariodacat   
#4  Rudy Hess  
#5  Eric & Flynn
#6  Catline Crew   
#7  Gemini &  Cheysuli   
#8  Sweet Praline
#9  Jan S.   
#10 Theresa D.
#11 Sushi   
#12 Kattonic Cats
#13 Catlady Diary  
#14 Kazoku Neko   
#15 Angelia
#16 Cindell M
#17 Scooby & Spikey's Mom
#18 Finny, Buddy & Jazzy & Gloria the Duck
#19 Allison
#20 Laura G.
#21 Arthur L.
#22 Sally
#23 Harry Spotter
#24 Monique P.
#25 Jmuhjy Acat
#26 Joan Marrie L.
#27 Jennifer D.
#28 Lisa H.

Then we went to this here website and did this: (you can click to biggify)

Random.Org
True Random Number Service

 
Our winner is #4!!!  The one and the only...Mr. Rudy Hess!!!

 And so dear friends, we are THRILLED to announce that the winner of our contest is the one and only, Mr. Rudy Hess!!!  Congratulations, Rudy Rudy!!!  You will be the proud recipient of 100 free customized postcards from Uprinting.com.  Like we said in the post announcin' the contest, you will have to pay shippin' charges for your postcards, but, DANG, they are gonna be so cool, it will be worth it!  You just gots to promise to send us one, 'kay?  Because we hosted this here contest, we will also receive 100 postcards.  We are gonna use ours for our Vowentimes!

Thanks, again, to all the cool peoples that participated in our Big-Ass Contest and...CONGRATULATIONS to Mr. Rudy Hess!

Very truly yours,
The Whiskers & Purrs Gang

 

A holiday video from us!

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

Don't forgit to enter our contest!!!

Dearest peoples on the innernets,

Don't forgit that the deadline to enter our big fancy contest is today at 5:00 pm eastern.  Just leave a comment tellin' us what you're thankful fors.  We will enter everybody's name that leaves a comment in a big ol' hat and draw the winner's name.  The winner of this contest will receive 100 free very real cool customized postcards from UPrinting.com

Remember...all you gots to do is leave a comment tellin' us what you are most thankfuls for this holiday season.  Please only enter one time.  We'll draw the winning name tonight and announce it in tomorrow's bloggy post!!!

Very truly yours,
The Whiskers & Purrs Gang

Elsie says a prayer...

   

Dearest God,

This is Miss Elsie Fallulah Graves speakin'...I know you probably know that, what with you bein' God and all, but...well...I just wants to make sure you know it's me.

I want to thank you for makin' my hiney all better.  It ain't swoled-up, itchy and red no mores.  I'm feelin' so much betters.  And, thank you for lettin' me leave the hospitals.  I was tired of bein' there and missed my family so much.  I want you to know that I have keept my promise to you...I have been a very real good girl and I ain't been mean to Little Joey Cartwright Graves III.  I even let him fall asleep last night with his back up against mine...and I didn't even try to kill him or nothin'.  I'm a womans of my word.  I made a promise to you and I am keepin' it forevers and evers.

God, I gots another request for you.  See, we found us a new friend.  His name is Rumpy Reindeer Threet.  He is the coolest doglet I've meeted...ever!  And, guess what?  His mommy is named "Jenny" just like my mommy!  She has a kind heart and loves all animals.  One day Rumpy's mommy went to the trash dump and found a beautiful wonnerful girl doglet.  Here's her picture:

Rumpy's mommy rescued her that day and gived her a home with lots of love.  Her name is Dede.  God, Dede is such a wonnerful doglet but she has lotsa troubles...I don't know all of her troubles but part of it probably stems from what she may have gone through before Rumpy's mommy rescued her.  She is nervous and skeert sometimes.  God, could you please whisper Dog Language in Dede's ear and let her know she is safe and loved and will always have a warm home with good foods and lovin' kisses?  Please help her to not be afraids, 'kay? 

I'm gonna ask all my wonnerful friends on the innernets to say prayers for Dede, too.  They was all so kind to say prayers for me and my hiney and that turned out real goods.  I just know we can all pray for Dede to be okay, too.

Thanks for watchin' over all the aminals in the world, God.  Please help the homeless critters to find shelter and foods and protect them from harm.

Very truly yours,
Miss Elsie Fallulah Graves
 

Contest Contest Contest!!!

Dearest peoples on the innernets,

This is all of us speakin'.  We are in the middle of a BIG-ASS snowstorm and we are lovin' it very real much!  Mommy is home and we are all piled up on the big bed with her...snoozin' and purrin' and kissin'!  Life.is.goods!

Since we are feelin' so happy and thankfuls for what we gots, we decided to have a contest with a cool giveaway...the winner of this contest will receive 100 free very real cool postcards from this company:

Ain't that cool???  And, 'cause we is hostin' this giveaway, we will git 100 free post cards, too!!!  Now the winner will have to pay for the shippin' of the cards, but it won't be a lot of green papers and the cards are so cool...they will really be worth it!  The cards are 4X6 on 14pt Cardstock Gloss and are printed in full color on both sides with the design of your choice!!!...we are gonna have our pictures on ours and use them to send to our friends for Valentine's Day!   So...here's the contest...just leave us a comment on our bloggy and tell us what you are most thankful for this holiday season.  We will enter everybody's name that leaves a comment in a big ol' hat and draw the winner's name.  The deadline to participate will 5:00 pm eastern, Monday, December 21, 2009.

Now, we want to make a very special 'pology to 2 of our very most special friends and their mommy..see, several weeks ago....maybe even longer, we had a contest and our dear friends, Laila & Minchie and Aunt Peggy, was the winners.  Well, mommy realized yesterday that SHE IS A DOOFUS AND NEVER SENDED THE PRIZE TO THEM!  We are so sorry, Laila & Minchie & Aunt Peggy!  Please know that we are takin' the appropriate disciplinary action toward our mommy.  Now, she can't git to the post office today 'cause the weather is so very real bads, but she WILL send you your prize on Monday...for REALS this time, or her big butt will be booted outta the house.

So...dear friends...please leave a comment and tell us what you are most thankfuls for.  We can tell you right now that we are most thankfuls for all of you...all of our sweet peoples on the innernets.

Very truly yours,
The Whiskers & Purrs Gang...and our slacker mommy, too!

What Elsie Did...

 Dearest peoples on the innernets,

This is all of us speakin'.  We wanted to let you all know that we are very real prouds of our big sister, Miss Elsie Fallulah Graves.  She is workin' real hard to keep her promise to God.  Even though she does not like Little Joey Cartwright Graves III, she has been real nice to him since she gotted home from the hospitals.  He was skeert 'cause he had to go for his first ever check-up and Elsie akchewally licked his head and told him it would be over quick-like.

Yesterday, mommy came home very real early from work.  We knowed somethin' was up 'cause she usually comes home late late late.   She looked very bad and said she feeled even worser.  Was all very skeert.  But our Top Cat, Miss Elsie Fallulah Graves, knowed exactly what to do...

See, mommy was feelin' so bads that she went straight to bed.  Elsie Fallulah told us all to be very quiet and to be very good children.  Then...Elsie jumped up on the bed and hopped up on mommy and started singin' her beautiful purry songs.  Mommy said Elsie purred so loud she could feel the vibrations all the way down to her toes!  After 'bout 3 hours of Elsie's purry songs, mommy started to feel better.

Yes, we are very proud of our Top Cat Elsie Fallulah Graves!  She is a wonnerful person!

Very truly yours,
The Whiskers & Purrs Gang