Dearest mommy,
I am sorry I hurted your ear. I didn't mean to do it. I knows you are very real mads at me. I know my big, high-powered attorney, Boob Boobonivich, says I ain't supposed to say nothin' 'bout the unfortunate incident but I just can't stand to have you mads at me. If you will just forgive me, I promise to use litter box every single day in 2010 and never ever pee in the floor agains.
I'm sorry, mommy. I love you.
Very truly yours,
Senator Henry Jackson Edward Graves III
